WELL WRITING THIS WAS LIKE WATCHING ICE MELT!! SHEESH!! JOIN VIRTUALCHRISTINE FOR A LOOOOOONG OVERDUE TALE OF PYROLUST,MAGIC, INTERGRID WARFARE, REGGAE AND OBVIOUSLY MOUNTAINS OF FREE STUFF!!! FIND OUT ABOUT CRAFT GRID’S PLANS FOR THE FUTURE WHICH INVOLVES LARGE QUANTITIES OF CHOCOLATE AND ART!! OH COME ON, WOULD I MAKE THAT UP? LEARN WHERE TO SCORE WORKING SPACE STATIONS !!! FIND OUT WHAT OTOLARYNGOLOGY MEANS!!!NO;THAT’S A REAL THING TOO!! FIND OUT ABOUT METAVERSE TOURS AND TALKING TREES!!HALF PIPES!! SANSCRIT!!!! RAINFORESTS!!VENETIAN CANALS!! LOVE MY HYPERGRID!!!ATTN NEWBIES!!!!!

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Here I am on Craft Grid’s Mathland region, one of several brainy builds by  oh so imaginative math and science teacher Michelle Techland.

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Liberally smattered with poseballs that make you appear far more intelligent than you actually are, it is the perfect place to take off your RL shoes, and work out how long it has been since oh, let’s say your last blog post.

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I ran through all my fingers, toes and the brainiac poseballs as the realization sunk in that  nearly two months had flown by-what the duck had happened?

Well, life happened. My kid had a big 17th birthday, both my jobs shifted into high gear yet again, while my health completely crapped out. Nothing exotic or sinister, just boogers, wheezing, borderline migranes, reams of antibiotics and ice packs, and an exciting addition to my medical repitoire that amounts to nothing less than a monument to this millenium’s intercultural synchronic destiny called  Jala Neti in Sanscrit; yes, under 21st century German medical advice, this New World denizen is using a 5,000 year old Hindi yogic technique of twice a day filling a  small douche bag with saline solution, ramming the tube up a nostril, slack jawed, upper spine twisted into a compact arch whilst gently squeezing said bag- thus purifying the sinal cavities  by ablution of the dust, pollen, bacteria and any last shred of  dignity into the dark belly of the Berlin “unterwelt”. After several weeks I can almost breath  without the use  of vestigial gills, and as an added bonus, my son radically re evaluated his admiration of several loutish youtube humorists when he  saw an actual “douche bag ” in action.

Hello my dearest dears! How marvelous! Here we all are, ready for another whirlwind adventure on OpenSim, the software platform that hosts hundreds of independent grids, some of which choose to be connected by an amped up teleportation system called the hypergrid, which allows you to endlessly explore these brave new worlds, making friends from all over the planet, having tons of exciting experiences, and scoring enough free content to make you just dizzy- with happiness of course , not the kind of dizzy when your baby boy’s last year as a legal minor looms on the horizon, and the snooty ear nose and throat specialist who has changed office three times since you landed in her dubious clutches, dropping elephantine hints about restraining orders, “reverse malpractice” and some sort of global otorhinlaryngological blacklist, as her  brutally medievil opening hours force you to scale her  4th floor balcony, ice bags straps and douche bag a dangle, pathetically moaning about tube suction ratios and amoebic gill symptomology, gives her tight, bitter little smile, and informs you that all alchohol consumption would be counterproductive towards your full recovery. Stupid woman. Were I imbibing, could I have navigated her  rose trellis at 4am with such unfettered aplomb?

If you do not know how to get on OpenSim, (and believe me, you are not alone) please see my “How to get on OpenSim in Six Ridiculously Easy Steps” page at the top of this blog. If you do not understand the terminology, please see my “Newbie Glossary” also at the top of this blog. Come on, it’s easy! Come spread your wings in the free metaverse!!

For today’s adventure there is not much point in you following me around, unless of course you are a serious antihistamene fetishist, but who the hell needs me any way? The free metaverse is a jumpin’, and there are so many great ways for you to find out what is going on these days!!

In the blogosphere:
The Hyperzette , Zaphod Enoch’s bilingual hypergrid  gazette, is really coming into it’s own! Concise, informative,  loaded with great photos and interesting interviews, every post has some nugget that will surprise longtime hypergridders, and help newbies get the most out of thier first forays into the black!

Metaverse Destinations  My friend Minethere Always collections of photos and hypergrid addresses will keep you occupied for, well, years concievably- her taste is impeccable,and there is the added bonus of her laidback Texas humor!

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Thirza Ember was one of the only people blogging about the hypergrid when I first arrived,  and after a long absence she is seriously back in the saddle!  Thirza is buddies with most of the OpenSim developers and big wigs, as well as the A list artists who have migrated to the hypergrid, so her posts are always cutting edge.

Google Plus    has become THE hypergrid social network. I understand that Google is heavilyly scented with Eau de Ginormous Multitentacled Corporate Borg Cube, but it is also where the free metaverse communicates, and if you do not have an account you are seriously missing out. You can friend me and I will reshare your questions, you can join general communities like OpenSim Virtual or Hypergrid Destinations, or Miney’s Metaverse Goofballs. Most grids, such as Metropolis Metaversum, Kitely, Craft, Selea’s World, Franco Grid, Sanctuary have active communities. Want to blog about the Hypergrid? Join Metaverse Bloggers. Interested in art? Try Arts in Virtual Worlds. Remember, friending does not work very well between grids, and the hypergrid has a far, far greater landmass than SL, so if you are going to try and meet people at random inworld, quit your day job and start those divorce proceedings now. For better or for worse, G+ is the only form of centralized communication  the hypergrid has. Be smart and use it.

And out on the hypergrid itself:

The Hypergrid Safari!- Every Wednesday, and one Sunday a month I believe,Thirza Ember and Linden artist in residence Wizard Gynoid, lead a really, really big, star studded, hypergrid sightseeing tour group, which Thirza then documents in her blog, and folks occasionally film. The destinations tend to be oriented toward her A list art crowd and big wig friends, making the whole shebang pretty darn impressive. Participation is free and absolutly everyone and thier cat is welcome. Keep an eye on the(duh) G+ group to find out where they are meeting.

The Metaverse Tour!- happens every Saturday night at 10pm CET. As of this writing they meet at…

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…the Kitely Welcome Center, address being   grid.kitely.com:8002:Kitely Welcome Center .  I have been on the tour three times now…

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See the tree lady to my left? That is tour guide Serene Jewell.

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The Metaverse Tour is low key, Serene is a, funny, relaxed guide, the groups are small and very friendly, the destinations are a delightfully eclectic mix, and the tour’s  focus on Kitely Grid,  (the first two stops are usually Kitely) which makes up freaking half of the hypergrid’s landmass folks, is a very smart move. Serene has lassoed friendly, prolific Kitely creator Min Tigerpaw and the staggeringly gifted Devokan Trust builder and organizer Dot Matrix  into becoming alternate guides; and as she keeps prowling my regions, rope a twirl, softly whistling the Bonanza theme, I am assuming I will be alternate guiding at some point in the near future. You can get more information about the Metaverse Tour on Serene Jewell’s, you’ll never guess it, yes G+ page!!

I know what you are thinking now. All right I don’t, but I know where I want this post to go, so what you are thinking (nudge nudge) is that if  virtualchristine, the groundbreaking blogger who burst on the scene in 2012 valiantly founding the first museum on the Hypergrid dedicated to that elusive yet legendary cultural titan, Arcadia Asylum, on a small region that has expanded to 11 regions and a library  on 3 grids due solely to her   heroic -you know this whole “playing along” scenario only works if you stay awake.

 

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So vis a vis Arcadia Asylum, the whole who the hell needs me thing kicked in yet again!!  This sign is hanging in…

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…the ground floor of…

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…my little Arcadia Asylum Library on Metropolis Grid, Region Independently Spoken, where you can  now pick up your copy of my entire Arcadia inventory with one click!! Thank you Crystal for all your dogged tenacity and hard work!! Oh yeah, to get there, plug the following address into your viewers world map, hit find, then teleport! hypergrid.org:8002:Independently Spoken !

And there’s more!! Here I am…

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…on Kitely Grid, region Cookie ll which is a film studio, and Hobo Center. The  pretty kitty is good humored SL film maker, actress, producer – you get the idea- Ada Radius, and  we are testing the FULLY SCRIPTED  Privateer boxes she has put out for the public to copy. Fully scripted as in EVERY FREAKING THING works, the elevators, doors, lights, seats E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!! They still need a bit of tweaking, but DAYUM, soon the days of my jamming doors open and shoving poseballs down toilets will have gone the way of the dodo and any positive connotation of the words “Tea Party”.  Ada is taking Arcadia on the hypergrid to a whole new level! She has also turned her friend Selby Evan’s  Cookie II regions into a really interesting Arcadia/Aley themed build, with floating islands, a railroad, underwater space craft and an ever growing slum city-I have all these things, but would never have thought to use them the way Ada has. You can contact her on the, oh what is that network called, G squared?  Minus? No!! Plus-G+!! And to help you get there: grid.kitely.com:8002:Cookie II

Okay, you got me. Putting up signs, testing space stations and going on tours IS doing something. There were days when sinal pressure left enough of my frontal lobes oxygenated to go inworld and do lightweight stuff.

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A while back, on a good day, I indulged in a bit of what I like to call “gate diving”.It works like this: you go to Shaun Emerald’s marvelous gate hub at sanctuary.homelinux.org:8012:Eld2, and just jump through gates randomly.You never know what you will find, or who you will meet.spellscape_001

This was a jump through the Spellscape Grid gate.  Attention grabber, isn’t it?

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After having a look at the twisty temple thingy-boo , I went for a walk over the hills. The countryside was lush…

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…and town had some really nice shops and features. It all seemed to be a kind of vaguely fantasy oriented role play grid.

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As I was snooping around in somebody named Xander Bing’s  office, a physically savaged, blade wielding Xander suddenly popped in and said hi.  Secure in the knowledge that halloween was just around the corner  and if people don’t want bloggers clicking away at thier desk drawers, they can lock the damned door,  I  confidently took a seat and complimented him on his impresive array of anatomical damage, as well as the bloody knife.He proudly stated the av was a present from a friend, for the grid’s upcoming Hallween party,  but was puzzled by the knife reference.

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It turned out to be  a red wand! Friendly Xander TPed us down to a really cool spell casting range…

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… and began blasting  the crap out of targets with the wand!  Apparently the grid is not simply for socializing and roleplay, it is run as a business by a group of programmers, who want to see where they can take OpenSim software. Although everything isn’t quite up and running, the idea is that there will be magical fantasy quests, which work in conjunction with the grid website.

spellscape_007  I noticed free magical equipment upstairs in the Magic Store, and Xander assured me that grid residents could participate in everything without paying a cent. Of course, the free game related items are non exportable, preventing people  from  making alterations and cheating. They saw me coming. Residents may rent land,sell merchandise and create thier own quests, which needn’t be fantasy oriented at all-I really found the whole thing to be very interesting and different and Xander, with the gaping hole in his chest and funky spellcaster mojo, was a complete charmer. Spellscape has some pretty impressive features, from content protection to a marketplace, that they created parallel to Kitely’s, whose fanfare obviously drowned the smaller grid out completely!   I would just like to point out  that if they would export thier wands, we could posse up and do something about that.  Here is the address-grid.spellscape.co.uk:80

And before THAT, I also had some unexpected fun, when my dude BFF (who will LOVE being called that) the World’s Most Amazing Estate Manager and I were yakking on Skype, and he suddenly said, ” Let’s go check this out!”

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So we gated on over to RezMela Mega who’s hypergrid address I can’t give you, because they are apparently, not always connected. Region owner Dr. Ramesh Ramloll had put out the address and word on ,where else, G+, that his lab was running technical tests and needed volunteers from the hypergrid. Like most men, the WMAEM is a nearly as big a sucker for the words “technical test” as he is for “open bar” or ” boobalicious”. And like most women, my interest in anything military that isn’t a playgirl centerfold is zero . But  my friend was enthused, so I gave a little tut tut about guys,and   dutifully began clicking.

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As he launched into his signature moves of crashing, changing viewers and cursing developers, I was working out how to get in the vehicles and drive, where my steering  skill level  led me to a  genuinly fun discovery…

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… you could blow stuff up! This was better than three of my therapists AND seasons 1-12 of the Montel Williams show!!

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When the WMAEM had finally settled on a viewer and could see properly, the entire field was aflame, as I  jumped into vehicle after vehicle,trying to find the soft spot on the stubbornly intact nuclear silos. The WMAEM acted suitably impressed by my level of carnage, expressed sympathy as to the lack of mushroom clouds, and asked if I had tried  the guns.  To my reply of “what guns? he gave a little tut tut about females,    pointed a tank at the silos, and dutifully began clicking the cannon controls. I wandered over to the far side of the field in hopes of finding, oooh, maybe a hunky Naval Cryptologist sporting a cute little rocket launcher when…

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Someone who was not Dr. Ramloll( I THINK, but I didn’t take notes) suddenly  popped in and said hi.  Secure in the knowledge that if people don’t want bloggers engulfing thier grids in  waves of hellfire, they can lock the damned hypergate, I confidently peered through the smoke and complimented him on his game. Friendly, good humored  whoever he was proudly stated that this was not a game, but actually a testing grid for programs to train emergency services!

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He clicked a doodad under a 15 story pointing finger that I, in my state of heightened pyrolust, had managed to overlook. This huge control panel rezzed. You selected lanscapes, vehicles, disaster worker NPC’s, you name it, from the little menu on the right, positioned them on the big map, et voila!

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With one click everything appears just as you laid it out! The WMAEM, who had been on the far side of the region working on the now  non existant tank, was having a huge WTF moment on skype, whilst I became immersed in playing with the panel, so there are no more pictures, BUT, at the risk of being too technical, I am telling you that this control panel is an absolutly unique HOOT; and when the grid is open to the public, the control panel is open too. Ingen Labs Grid, hooks up to the hypergrid fairly often, but not regularly, so you need to keep an eye on Dr. Ramesh Ramloll’s comments where…?? G+ is where!!!

And much much farther back, when I had just finished my last blog post, I started on an old to do list. The terraforming disaster with which I had begun my last post, was a direct result of starting that list.

You see, I DO have long term plans beyond cross grid invasion, wand cheats and nukes. When I  moved ALL the boxed collections from my 2 region Arcadia Asylum museum on Craft, to thier own region on my new 9 grid museum on Sanctuary, I figured the two Craft  museum regions would be sufficiently unconstipated, (I apologize if this is too technical) to handle to putting out some of the  really really big honking pieces in the African Slums collection. Blissfully unaware that my light headcold would soon morph into the sinal apocalypse, I threw myself into the to do list.

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Like setting up a rainforest mountain range….

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…in the African Homelands of craft-world.org:8002:The Spirit of Arcadia
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And the craft-world.org:8002:Monte Gordo region doubled in size!!

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You can  use the  teleport  system to get to  our new section, Cidade Baixa, (the lower city) or you can walk from the upper city. The two entry points are in this square….

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…you can go down into Aime Cesaire subway station, and walk through the newly laid tunnel. The train doesn’t work YET, but I have left a catnip trail from Cookie II to the station entrance, so something could happen any day now.

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Or you can walk down Jack Kerouac Alley, through the old Barbary Coast illustration…

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..and there you are, in a new Chinatown Alley!

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I have finally been able to put up the slum church, hotel, and diner…

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…past the church and diner, is the entrance to the Leopold Sedar Senghor subway station, a wonderfully grotty public restroom, and I have put the  slummy half  pipe into a beautifully graffiti lined People’s Park!

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In the spirit of Arcadia’s Open Source Urban Bling Project, I have started collecting creative commons licenced, or public domain wall murals, graffitti and images from all over the planet, and bringing them inworld. Seriously, I have graffiti here from freaking Katmandu. My favorite is this beautiful  Spanish mural of Nobel Prize winner Toni Morrison. If something is set to copy, the appropriate information should be in the description; please play nice  and use the images according to thier license:)

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Across the as yet unnamed plaza, is the Slum City Jesus Mission, and series of arches that sports Ethiopian graffiti and a lovely  old public domain photo of a unit of Buffalo Soldiers.  Walk through the open archway to…

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…the Trenchtown section of Slum City!!!!

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For those of you having a serious what the duck moment, – Trenchtown a poor area of Jamaican capital Kingston, is probably one of the best known slums in the world, whose most famous son,Robert Nesta “Bob” Marley, cemented his hometown, his Rastafari way of life with it’s Pan African roots, and Jamaica’s rich music scene   firmly into western mainstream culture during the 1970`s. Well, mon, it’s exciting to ME!!

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Okay, it’s like this, I  take Bob Marley so seriously that I looped No Woman No Cry for every chemo session and before all 5 operations when I had cancer , and I honestly believe that  Bob’s deep spiritual message and in your face politics make Trenchtown a splendidly appropriate addition to Slum City. And across the street from Marcus Garvey square, behind the Rasta colored walls…

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…will, hopefully, one day be the Culture Yard, the RL Museum, cultural center, and Jamaican National Heritage site that was once the “government yard in Trenchtown” where Vincent “Tata” Ford  ran a soup kitchen and hosted all night music sessions with aspiring young artists, including one who was courting a girl named Rita, and wanted to learn how to play the guitar. This is the acknowledged birthplace of Reggae music. Everyone from Snoop Dog to Prince Charles has come by to pay thier respects .

And as I was pluggin away at me build and odda tings, I noticed that Craft Grid seemed very quiet. Hardly anyone seemed to be was online. Okay, I knew that a few friends had moved onto different projects, and that, with starting the new Sanctuary museum and the summer break, I had been away from Craft  for a few months now. Maybe I was just missing the action. So I would make little excursions.

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I was relieved that Craft’s beautiful mainland regions seemed to be intact. The beach at Onda, craft-worl-OMG I just can’t do the address thing anymore. Look, if you want the address for any of these craft regions, just type craft-world.org:8002:whatever the hell the region name is, okay? …

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…which leads to the lovely walled city of Opera….

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…from whose towers the mainland regions…

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…with thier fantastic freebie shopping areas…

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…wildly eclectic landscapes…

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…and some of the best connecting pathways on the hypergrid, make Craft such a cool place to call home. Hey wait a sec, that looks familiar…

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…yes, two of my favorite places are now located off the mainland coast! The bright lights of region Pyramid OSIta and peaceful beauty of  Margye Dreams are as impressive as ever.

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I found my buddy GeR Orsini’s Region Uptown, a major costume and accessories region had moved as well…

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…but was all there, right down to the last blood soaked throne and pair of Geta sandals.

My snooping uncovered stuff I hadn’t seen before as…

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Michelle’s really big Mathland build…

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…and my Facebook buddy Phil Taylor was messing with this really mondo labyrinth on region Borderlands. I got SO freaking lost!

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Someone I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of meeting named Francisco Siciliano had started what appeared to be freebie regions on Italia 1 and 2!

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And because there seems to be no stopping Italians from giving away stuff in style…

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…Hashanty Yifu had started a Venice themed build with freebie boutiques on region Jolie!

Octagenarian meister builder Yoster Allen was back and working on a new region  educational region called Heritage! Charming Aria Aira was putting her fairy region back up on a new build called Starlight. Metaverso, Delta, Agra,Campos, the fabulous beaches of Des Maldives- I could go on and on-were all still there. Craft seemed to be not just intact but building away, yet things were  still off. Where were the cool events, the crazy parties?  Why was the Welcome Center on region Hydra so out of date? And where the heck were the owners, Licu Rau and Tao Quan?? I left the two fugitives reams of of nosey IMs and waited.

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It wasn’t long befor Licu and Tao had sent me a TP to a colorful build I had never seen before. Apparently, they had been inworld the whole time, but incognito, as they were working like fiends on, get this, a new  grid .Let me tell you, I did not see that one coming.

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Yes that is a candy cane  train station. Now focus, this is where the story really gets going. Apparently, Licu has been getting requests for a long time from his rather formidable array of artist friends and aquaintences, for a really secure grid; something  on the hypergrid, where they could put out thier best stuff without worrying about it being stolen or copied, and a monetary system, so they could do business. And THAT is what Licu and Tao have been working on! The new grid will be called Avidreams, and would open possibly at Christmas, definitly in the early new year.

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Yes that is teddy bears skiing on a chocolate mountain. I thought we talked about focusing. Anyway, Craft Grid will not only stay non profit, the revenue generated by the commercial grid will suppliment it; already the limit on how many sims you can link to Craft from an external server has been lifted, an opportunity that former residents of the still offline OS Grid have been using like …

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…a desert fork the size of a snow shovel in this place!

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Oh alright. This is Cyberland region, which will be Licu’s and Tao’s personal commercial venture on the new grid.

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This build will feature a game,which you can play to win Avidreamz currency and you should be able to buy most of the individual pieces. I really hope this region will be open for Christmas; the train ride, sweeties and toys will be a perfect holiday outing:))!

Then the events began happening!!

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On Craft’s region Chameleon there was a Chocolate party!! I swear I put on five pounds.

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Then Chameleon morphed into Hogwart’s castle for the Voldemort Party, which I missed as the horseman of pestilance began using my respiratory system as his own personal steeplechase, but Licu gave me a private tour where I got a cool Slytherin scarf!!! Nosey IMs just pay and pay.

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One of the most dramatic changes happened on Craft’s welcome region, Hydra. You can see Hydra Station, out beyond the green hills, in the distance. Wait for it.

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Ta Da!! This is the brand new Hydra!!!!!

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There are now hypergates on both sides of the familiar little stone structure.The gates on this side, with a  bridge that leads to the famous Craft Department Store…

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…are internal Craft Destinations, organized into themed “platforms”…

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….like interesting places.  Which idiot calls thier region “Fat Mountain?” in Portuguese? Oh yeah.

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On the other side, is a gate hub to most of the big grids, plus  a few little charmers.

But to me the best thing of all is this:)

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Region MdM is back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The Museum del Metaverso period was a golden time for Craft and the hypergrid.  A list artists from all over the world came to participate in the Museo’s unique cross media events,  often to try out OpenSim for the first time. Project leader Roxelo Babenco is putting out press releases and all kinds of feelers for the old crowd to come back, and anyone new to get on board for participation in concerts lectures exhibitions- you name it.

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Even if it means I have to amputate my freaking nose, I am NOT gonna miss any of this!!!

And now my dears I must love you and leave you. Thanks to one of my beloved fans , who’s RL job involves leading an ex Mossad “security group”,  I have managed to once more locate my lady ENT, and have booked an appointment with the deeply shaken creature for tommorrow morning! So here’s hoping! I have no idea when I will be back to my usual level of chirping at all of you, so enjoy the peace and quiet while you can! I would like to thank the WMAEM, Licu and Tao, whoever gave me such a charming tour at RezMela Mega, Xander, Roxelo, Ada, Serene, Miney and the whole G+gang, and of course all of YOU, for accompanying me on my small adventures. Your company means more to me than I can say. The sweetest of dreams and the brightest of days to you all. Until next time, adieu!

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One Response to WELL WRITING THIS WAS LIKE WATCHING ICE MELT!! SHEESH!! JOIN VIRTUALCHRISTINE FOR A LOOOOOONG OVERDUE TALE OF PYROLUST,MAGIC, INTERGRID WARFARE, REGGAE AND OBVIOUSLY MOUNTAINS OF FREE STUFF!!! FIND OUT ABOUT CRAFT GRID’S PLANS FOR THE FUTURE WHICH INVOLVES LARGE QUANTITIES OF CHOCOLATE AND ART!! OH COME ON, WOULD I MAKE THAT UP? LEARN WHERE TO SCORE WORKING SPACE STATIONS !!! FIND OUT WHAT OTOLARYNGOLOGY MEANS!!!NO;THAT’S A REAL THING TOO!! FIND OUT ABOUT METAVERSE TOURS AND TALKING TREES!!HALF PIPES!! SANSCRIT!!!! RAINFORESTS!!VENETIAN CANALS!! LOVE MY HYPERGRID!!!ATTN NEWBIES!!!!!

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